10 easy steps to installing a new video card

July 19th, 2006

When you’re main computer gets a couple of years old, and it wasn’t that good to start with, modern games just don’t work.  Of course you can’t take them back, either.  I tried.  They said we could exchange the software for another copy of the same thing.  Duh!  It’s not defective!  I know the size of my hard drive, I know that I run XP and that I have 512K of memory on a Pentium 4, but I never memorized the specs of my video card, so how in the hell would I know that this game wouldn’t work!

I finally gave in to kid pressure and put down the cash for a new video card. 

I like to tinker with computers.  I’m hardly qualified to be a member of the Geek Squad, but I know more than enough to get by, so installing a new video card should be a snap, right?  It probably is for someone who does this sort of stuff all the time, but, well, I don’t.

So here’s how to install a new video card in 10 easy steps:

1.  Open the very large box to find a small PCI card, an installation disk, and a single sheet of paper with instructions.

2.  Follow the instructions.  (damn, this is easy!)

3.  Scratch your head when what the directions say is supposed to happen doesn’t happen.

4.  Realize that the instructions are not in any particular order.

5.  Scratch your head when what the directions say is supposed to happen doesn’t happen.

6.  Throw away the instructions, fearing that you may have to call this guy.

7.  Tell your son, again, that it’s not working yet, but don’t worry, I’ve got a handle on it.

8.  Take the matter into your own hands, tinker around a bit, change this setting, tweak that setting.

9.  Reboot and say a prayer.  “Dear God, please make this work.”

10.  Pat yourself on the back, pretend for a moment that you’re really smart, and realize why you don’t do this for a living.

RJ’s Epoxy Stone

July 18th, 2006

A friend of mine flipped on Channel 5 to check the temperature last night, and what happened to appear? An ad for RJ’s Epoxy Stone. “Just look for the cactus out front” it said.

Friendly_Cactus.JPG

So now we know what the friendly crazy cactus tree business on SW Adams, as seen on NTPL, actually is.

And what is Epoxy Stone? It’s small river rock ‘epoxied’ together to make surfaces such as these:

epoxy-stone.jpg epoxy-stone2.jpg

I learn something new everyday.

Typo

July 18th, 2006

Board member Debbie Wolfmeyer said she thought property owners near the current school would be willing to sell their houses.

“I live in the East Bluff, the heart of the East Bluff,” Wolfmeyer said. “I have had lots of people come up to me and say, ‘The value of my house is $80,000, but I’d get out for $60,000.’”

I think the Journal Star meant to say “I’d get out for $160,000

Oops.

 

Cahill said if the school board votes to put a new school where the current Glen Oak school is, the district will still have future interest in Glen Oak Park.

Interesting. So even if Dist 150 reluctantly takes the school site, which CJ doubts they will, they’d still take the park…

Her name was Lola, she was a showgirl…

July 17th, 2006

Apparently not everyone is a fan of Barry Manilow’s Copacabana; at least not every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night from 7-Midnight.

The local council in Rockdale, in Sydney’s southern suburbs, started a six-month trial of high-volume hits by Manilow and Doris Day to chase away car enthusiasts who were gathering on weekend nights at Cook Park Reserve.

“The initial reaction was that they found it irritating,” [mayor] Saravinovski said. “I’m not disputing what the residents are saying. I can’t swallow some of the tracks like `Mandy.’

“We have tried to reduce the sound and we are reviewing the songs. I don’t mind Barry Manilow, but I’m more of an ABBA and Celine Dion fan.”

Mr Mayor, I think you should mix it up a little.  ABBA and Celine Dion (can you imagine having to listen to My Heart Will Go On over and over!?) are good suggestions.  How about a little Rod the Bod, or Michael Bolton.  Maybe even some Rick Springfield or Peter Cetera.  How about they throw Eddie Murphy’s Party All The Time into the mix.

What I really think they should do is have the residents take turns making up their own playlists.  It could be fun.  I know I have tons of music that I could play which would annoy the hell out of the partiers.  If any Bradley kids move in next door to me, I’m going to start jamming.  They won’t know what hit ‘em.

…with yellow feathers in her hair and a dress cut down to there… 

Welcome fellow Bob fans from around the world

July 16th, 2006

To those who are making my stat counter go through the roof, scroll down a little and you’ll find what you’re looking for, or click here.

I encourage you to take a moment and leave a comment or just say Hi.

The Glen Oak School controvery is starting to make my head spin.

July 15th, 2006

Ken Hinton put the city’s balls in a vice and now we’re looking to spend $500,000.00 and beg him not to built at the park. Maybe Ken Hinton should’ve asked for more. He might have gotten it.

10 acres? What happened to the stance that the Glen Oak School Site absolutely had to have 15? Did it only require 15 so they could head back over to the park?

What about the homes that have already been bought near the Park? Sell them back? Buy up the rest and expand the park?

“The letter, however, stressed this proposal doesn’t mean the city has the resources to help build the other proposed new schools.”
What if Dist 150’s tax hike has to go to public vote like Blagojevich wants? How’s that going to fly?

Martha Ross says “I’m just looking at what’s best for the Children”. I’m getting tired of someone saying this in nearly every article. I guess it’s their mantra: If you are talking to the press and don’t want to answer the question, just say you want what’s best for the kids, and they’ll go away.

And where is the city getting it’s money? Manning says he’ll get it from other funding resources. It’s probably more common that I’d like to know, but if you go through a process of securing money for a specific project, how right is it to spend it on something else? I’d be a little ticked if I loaned my kids some money to buy books and they decided that they really needed a new video game instead.

This has been going on so long, I don’t know what they could possibly do at this point to recover. Maybe they should just do what they wanted to do in the first place and say the hell with popular opinion, because it’s been blown to bits anyway.

It just seems like everyone’s chain is being yanked, and it’s really starting to get annoying.

I could never be a politician, I just don’t have what it takes. 

It’s Hotter Than Hell!

July 15th, 2006

David Letterman’s Top Ten Signs It’s Too Damn Hot:

10. It’s so hot, Tom Ridge had raised the terror alert to “Sticky”

9. It’s so hot, drug dealers are selling something called “Iced Crackuccino”

8. It’s so hot, Michael Moore’s making a new movie, “Fahrenheit 98 and Humid”

7. It’s so hot, Randy Johnson is demanding a trade to Montreal

6. It’s so hot, Jennifer Lopez just got engaged to Mister Softee

5. It’s so hot, delicious hot pockets are now simply referred to as “pockets”

4. It’s so hot, Martha Stewart just got an inside tip on air conditioners

3. It’s so hot, even Ralph Nader’s campaign is showing traces of heat

2. It’s so hot, Courtney Love has an excuse for being disoriented and unintelligible

1. It’s so hot, hookers are charging 50 dollars just to blow on you

Robin Williams from Good Morning Vietnam: “It’s hot! Damn hot! Real hot! Hottest things is my shorts. I could cook things in it. A little crotch pot cooking.”

“It’s gonna be hot and wet! That’s nice if you’re with a lady, but ain’t no good if you’re in the jungle!”

Spike Lee’s movie Do The Right Thing: “It ain’t never to hot to fuck!”

 

PeoriaIllinoisan’s Top Ten Albums of Robert Zimmerman

July 12th, 2006

Aka: Bob Dylan, born in Duluth, Mn, raised in the heart of the ‘iron range‘ in the town that moved (literally)- Hibbing, Mn. Later he would be recognized as the greatest singer-songwriter the world has ever known.

1. Blood On The Tracks, 1974. In the midst of divorce from his wife Sara, he put together this gutsy heart-wrenching album that displays every emotion thinkable. In a later interview he had this to say about it: “A lot of people tell me they enjoy that album. It’s hard for me to relate to that. I mean, people enjoying that kind of pain.” To quote an earlier song of his: “Pain sure brings out the best in people, doesn’t it?”

2. Highway 61 Revisited, 1965. An absolutely genius album and considered by many one of the greatest albums ever recorded. If I didn’t like Blood on the Tracks so much, I’d put this as my #1, as many do. It is an album that forever changed the face of rock music and what it could be, starting with the great in your face put down song “Like A Rolling Stone” which clocked in at over 6 minutes in the era of 2-3 minute radio singles.

The Beatle’s Nowhere Man grew out of Dylan’s “Ballad Of A Thin Man”; the confused person that just doesn’t quite get it. “Because something is happening here, but you don’t know what it is, do you Mr. Jones”. The Counting Crows big hit “Mr. Jones” has the lyric “I want to be Bob Dylan, Mr. Jones just wishes he were a little bit more funky.”

The bar was raised, and music would never be the same.

3. Bringing It All Back Home, 1965. Released 6 months prior to Highway 61, this was the start of the transformation into the electric Bob Dylan. The first side of the album is riveting Rock & Roll. Bowing down to his roots, the 2nd side is all acoustic, though they hardly can be called folk songs. This is the first of the three albums at which he is at his artistic peak- thoughts and surreal images flying out of his head at breakneck speed. This album contains Subterranean Homesick Blues (the card-flipping video that INXS paid tribute to in the 80’s), and Mr. Tamborine Man- a song that has nothing to do with Tamborines and was popularized by the Byrds with a shorter radio-friendly version. Take note of the Beatle’s lyrical leap around this time (Rubber Soul, Revolver)… it’s no coincidence.

4. The Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan, 1962. His 2nd album release, and first of all original material. This put him on forefront of the intellectual folk music map with “Blowin’ In The Wind”, the sweet “Girl From The North Country”, the best kiss-off song of all time, “Don’t Think Twice It’s Alright”, and the antiwar song “Masters of War” which ends with the biting lyric to those in power who sit in their mansions and send kids off to war: “And I hope that you die. And your death’ll come soon. I’ll follow your casket. In the pale afternoon. And I’ll watch while you’re lowered. Down to your deathbed. And I’ll stand o’er your grave. ‘Til I’m sure that you’re dead.”

No wonder why he was considered a protest singer.

5. The Bootleg Series, Vol 4, Live 1966, The Royal Albert Hall Concert. This is probably the most famous bootleg ever; finally ‘officially’ released in 1998. Bob Dylan was the hero and savior in the ‘intellectual’ Folk Music crowd and Rock & Roll carried no respect. Dylan had moved on, Like A Rolling Stone was #1 on the charts, and he was considered a sellout. This concert documents the anger felt and is a major turning point in history. The first half of the concert finds the audience in reverential awe of his acoustic set. In the 2nd set, chaos erupts, as he dons and electric guitar with his band (later to claim their own fame as The Band). After listening to boos and heckling from the crowd between songs, the famous “JUDAS!” shout comes out of the audience just before his final number. He turns to the Band and yells “PLAY FUCKING LOUD!” as he shove the song down their throats he tears through the greatest version of “Like A Rolling Stone” you’ll ever hear.

6. Blonde On Blonde, 1966. The final of his trio of groundbreaking mid-sixties albums- the first Rock double album ever released. Quoting from the Dylan Encyclopedia: “Blonde On Blonde is a monument to the Dylan muse and everything a great work of art, rock ‘n’ roll, or otherwise, shoud be: profound, poetic, irreverent, funny, expressive, and diverse… the list could go on forever. If Dylan had never recorded another note, this would have turned him into a myth instead of merely an icon- and still might yet. It is a collection for the ages: rare is the person, be they musician, poet, Wall Street arbitrageur, postdebutante, or grease monkey, who comes away unaffected by Blonde on Blonde.”

7. Time Out Of Mind, 1997. After a near death bout of pericarditis, this album came out to huge critical acclaim. It surprisingly reached #10 on the album charts and gave him his first and long deserved Grammy for Album of The Year. The songs are mostly dark in nature, written by an older and more reflective Dylan that features a deep and gravely voice reminiscent of Tom Waits, and is produced by Daniel Lanois. Contrary to popular belief, it was recorded before his long hospital stay and recovery, but it is certainly understandable to think it was recorded afterwards.

8. Oh Mercy, 1989. At the recommendation of U2’s Bono, Dylan chose Daniel Lanois to produce his first album in several years. Neither knew what they were getting into. Lanois remodeled a building in the French Quarter for the specific use as a recording studio for this single project. Lanois is a sculpter of sound, Dylan is an old school one-take live in the studio performer. Apparently the butted heads quite a bit during the recording of this album. Lanois, having recently produced U2, Peter Gabriel and The Neville Brothers, was hardly star-stuck by Dylan and bugged the hell out of him; Dylan, hardly star-stuck by Lanois, bugged the hell out of him back.

It is said Lanois (maybe Townshend style?) destoyed a Dobro out of frustration, and Dylan would often leave the studios to walk the streets of New Orleans to vent. Lanois called Dylan lazy, and Dylan thought Lanois spent too much time messing around with take after take, mixing and remixing. The final results were more than pleasing to everybody and resulted in easily the best album since Slow Train Coming, and without a doubt, one of his best sounding albums ever.

9. John Wesley Harding, 1968. At the height of his creative powers, Dylan was involved in a motercycle accident which took him out of commission and out of the limelight.  Whether he was actually in an accident or just made up the whole affair to take a break from the chaos of his breakneck career is still open to speculation.  What is known though, is he retreated to the small country town of Woodstock, New York and holed up with The Band at “Big Pink” where he would record with them in a makeshift studio which resulted in both The Band’s vital “Music From Big Pink” and the first bootleg the world would ever know, finally to be officially released as “The Basement Tapes” in 1975.

The album itself found Dylan in a new before unheard smooth voice and with a laid-back folksy country feel to it, while still retaining his exceptional writing ability.  This subdued album was released during the height of psychedelica in the time of “Sgt Peppers”, and The Stone’s “Their Satanic Magesties Request”, and featured the song that Jimi Hendrix made famous: “All Along The Watchtower”.

10. The Bootleg Series 1-3, 1997.  What can I say? Three cd’s of unreleased songs that are better than most artists official albums…

Does this help, BJ, or just muddy up the waters more? I’m no fan of greatest hits albums, but there is an excellent 3 cd box set called Biograph that gives a great overview of his career up until 1985… oh yea, it was also the first multi-album (and cd) box set that we now see so frequently with hits, out-takes, and alternate versions of songs.

I’d be more than happy to burn some cd’s for you (or anyone else) of anything I have if you want to email me… of course that would be illegal, wouldn’t it!?

Glen Oak Zoo - A Zoo For You

July 11th, 2006

A_Zoo_For_You.JPG

Old MacDonald had a farm,
  E I E I O.
And on this farm were farm animals,
  E I E I O.
But none were so fine as those that are mine
  in the fabulous Glen Oak Zoo.
So come with me and let us see
  the Barnyard in Glen Oak Zoo.

In my quest to own all books Peoria, I grabbed this one off of eBay for about 10 bucks after shipping, not quite knowing what I was buying, other than a supposed children’s book that referenced Glen Oak Zoo- maybe something my kids would like to read.  Boy, was I in for a rude awakening!

64 page paperback, written by Shirley Stever Rice, and published by the Henry News-Republican in 1964.

I guess that it is a testament to zoo’s of the time period, especially smaller ones such as Glen Oak. Animals in confinement cells… exotic animals in rooms smaller than my college dorm… monkeys behind the steel bars… although it is thankfully undergoing massive changes, Glen Oak Zoo, as we know it today, hasn’t changed much since this book was written.

But- it’s the way this book is written that just floored me.  Each page or two is devoted to an animal at the zoo through black and white line drawings and so-so poetry written in the first person/animal so as we can pretent understand, relate, and be their friend.  At the time, it may have been a nice book, but in this day and age, it’s downright depressing and quite disturbing.  My wife said I can absolutely not let our children read it (and I agree, other than as a history lesson).

So as to not allow this single post to be too long, I have put up some of the better excerpts in posts below that I think you’ll enjoy.

(I seriously think Bonnie Noble and the Zoological Society should use this book as fundraising material!)

As you wander through the zoo,
  The animals in the cages
May vary from time to time
  From the animals on these pages.
But do not fear, my dears,
  For if you cannot find us,
We may be in a new home;
  But our love for you shall bind us
To the fabulous Glen Oak Zoo.
  It is the Zoo For You.
And don’t forget to come back, too,
  To meet the animals who are new.

Dona the Elephant

July 11th, 2006

Eli.JPG

Once upon a time, not too long ago, I lived between the jungles and the plains.

I roamed with a herd, staying close to my mother, and nibbled on sweet bamboo shoots.

‘Twas a lovely spring day, the one I remember, when suddenly, out of the blue

Came a roar, the like of which never I’d heard, and it made me so very afraid.

We all started to run, and the bulls trumpet hard, and I know something was very wrong

For no lightning did strike, and no rain did fall, but a giant bird swept down so low.

I stumbled and fell, and my mother ran on, and I no longer could find my way;

And then I was caught, trapped by some men, and loaded in a small den-like cage.

Ever so swiftly I was sent far away, never my mother to see;

I cried loudly, my heart nearly broke, I was lonely and frightened to death.

Away we soared into the heavens and flew for ever so long;

Now I’m here in the Glen Oak Zoo; the nightmare is all left behind.

I have found some new friends, who love me I know, and care for me tenderly.

My new name is Dona, an honor bestowed upon me, in memory of a kind man.

I was baptized in true Indian fashion, with Olive Oil poured over my head,

An impressive ceremony for all who attended, and I stood there and trumpeted proud.

I’m an Indian Elephant from Bangkok, Thailand, but now I’m a Glen Oak Zooer.

So linger a while and talk to me long, I have so much to learn

About the ways of the zoo, and the tricks I can do, and the friends I shall call my own.

Ali the Alligator

July 11th, 2006

I’m Ali the Alligator, leathery hard

And I snip, snap, and bite; always on guard.

I like little fingers, a tasty delight,

And that’s why Suellen shuts my mouth tight

Whenever we go ’round the Pet Ring

For you to touch me.  It’s quite a thing

To see a living pocketbook wriggle around

And be able to pet it and then sit down. 

King. The lonely Lion

July 11th, 2006

I’m regal and I’m royal, I’m the KING OF BEASTS it’s true;

In fact I reign quite loudy over Glen Oak Zoo.

My name is King.

My ancestral home is the African plains, the tall grass bush country.

But I was born here at Glen Oak Zoo and roam a cage for three.

This is my fling.

I’ve grown old and wise with time, and now I sit and stare

At the many children who come to see a lion in his lair.

My name is King.

I’m a bit sad and lonely too, for Maggie, my lifetime mate

Has left this life, and me, alone; now I sit and wait.

Lonely song I sing.

Pamala the Monkey

July 11th, 2006

Pam.jpg

My name is Pamela, but many call me Pam.

Throughout the zoo, there is no bigger ham.

I love to rassel, swing, and play, and watch the children file by;

But my glory-time does come when my trainer works to try

To teach me new and different tricks, like walking the tight rope,

Or pushing a doll carriage down a long and winding slope.

Of course I’d rather hop right in and putt ’round in my car,

Or play on my piano, (in this I should be far.)

I dearly love to hug and kiss little children near my size,

But when I’m out around the zoo, so many question, “It is wise?”

Never mind, I still have fun, I hop and skip, and jump and run.

Hooty & Sooty

July 11th, 2006

Further on in the next show cage are two sleepy occupants,

Hooty and Sooty, two baby Barred Owls, give out with slow even chants.

Eyes open wide, they’re a picture so wise, but most often you see them asleep,

For night is their time to hunt and to howl. Daytime they just sit and weep

For their freedom is lost. They paid a high cost. A free meal they get every day,

But listen now, chum, to why they’re so glum, they no longer can fly free and play.

Johnny’s Italian Steakhouse

July 11th, 2006

A few nights ago my wife and I (sans children) were looking for a nice dinner.  She suggested one of the local Italian restaurants, but I’ve gotten a little burned out on that lately, so I countered with taking Angie’s advice and giving Red Zin another try.  Try as I might, after an absolutely horrible experience a year or so ago, she vowed never to go back and there was nothing I could do to talk her into it.

I don’t know why I suggested Johnny’s, but it came out of my mouth before I could close it.  I’ve never had a bad meal there, but I’ve never had a meal that blew me away either.  I’ve always thought Johnny’s as way over-rated, but it’s tough to beat the atmosphere, and for the guys- is there anything better than using the urinal while staring at Marilyn Monroe!?  I don’t know what’s in the Ladies room, but it certainly can’t be as good.

Well, I finally had the meal that blew me away.  Super tender and juicy Stuffed Pork Chops, complete with a big ‘ol bone sticking out that made me feel like I was Fred Flintstone.  I’m hardly a wordsmith, so I can’t give it a ‘proper’ review, but suffice to say, it was d-e-l-i-c-i-o-u-s.

With all the great restaurants in town, I still think Johnny’s is over-rated, but I may be a little less apt to give out a sigh the next time someone suggests we go there… and I’m getting the Stuffed Pork Chops.