More Neighborhood Fun

Last night around 9pm there was a car outside my house a few doors down laying on the horn.  Not just a little.  A lot.  I looked out my front door but didn’t see anything out of the ordinary and sat back down to watch the news. Then it went off again- an extremely long and angry blast of a car horn.

My kids are in bed and I’m headed there soon.  I figured it was a teenager honking for his buddy a few doors down, and frankly I’d had enough, so I figured I’d ask politely for him to stop laying on the horn this late at night.

As I walk towards the car, the door opens and a 30ish colored female steps out.  The exchange went something like this:

Crazy Lady: Who the F*ck are you!?

Me, somewhat surprised by the situation: Excuse me?

Crazy Lady: I said who the F*ck are you!?

Me, politely: Could you please stop honking your horn.  This is a residential neighborhood and children are trying to sleep.

Crazy Lady: F*ck you. Who the F*ck do you think you are?

Me: I would just appreciate it if you’d stop honking your horn.

Crazy Lady: F*ck you. Get the F*ck out of my face or I’m going to F*ck you up!

…at that moment another car approaches in reverse from the other end of the street…

2nd Crazy Lady: Hey bitch, where you been?

1st Crazy Lady: I’ve been waiting for you, but this guy is in my face and he’d better leave or I’m going to beat the Sh*t out of him!

2nd Crazy Lady: I thought you were going to meet me down there.

…I walk away, not wanting to get shot, stabbed or beaten by the crazy lady on crack and let them continue arguing amongst themselves…

7 Responses to “More Neighborhood Fun”

  1. JW Says:

    “colored female”? Pink, orange, magenta?

  2. PeoriaIllinoisan Says:

    Would you prefer I say African-American or Black?

  3. sctobrien Says:

    There should be a special place for those assholes in life that when caught doing something wrong, try to turn the person pointing out the errors of their ways into being the asshole.

    PI, I applaud your ‘nads going out there to confront some jerk, but these days it’s almost too dangerous to do these things.

  4. Chef Kevin Says:

    What gets me, P.I. is the fact that they are too lazy to even dial a cellphone to say “Hey, I’m here, drag your ass out”. Ok, maybe they don’t have a cellphone, but I think right now, I only know two people who don’t…what’s the odds?

  5. JW Says:

    If she had been caucasion, would you have referred to her as “colorless”?

    (I’m just playin’ here, it’s been eons since I’ve heard anybody use the word “colored”.)

  6. PeoriaIllinoisan Says:

    Granted, JW, I’m not politically correct.

    Scott, I thought I was going to be confronting a 17 year old ‘colorless’ teenager, though I guess I’m surprised.

    Kevin, you can add 1 more to your list. I don’t have a cell phone.

    Funny thing about this is that Halloween (the day before) was unusually quiet around here.

  7. Scott J Says:

    Could it be she was pissed because Krispy Creme hasn’t opened yet?

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