Simple Lessons for Stupid People

If your drunk ass is walking around Harrison Homes looking for a party at which you decide to start doing shots with three other guys you’ve never met … don’t talk smack about one of their girlfriends … at 3am …

… and if you do talk smack about one of their girlfriends and end up getting the shit beat out of you … try to remember where the party house was when you flag down the cops.

A man walking from Bartonville to South Peoria early Tuesday was beat up by three men near the Harrison Homes after he got into an argument with them after drinking shots of cognac.

The 22-year-old victim told police about 3 a.m. he was walking on Adams Street from Bartonville, and once he crossed into Peoria, he stopped at a house by the Harrison Homes.

Though he could not describe the house to police, the victim said while he was there he drank Hennessy with three males he didn’t know. As they hung out, the victim and his newly acquired friends got into an argument about a girl, police reports stated.

The victim told police the dispute spilled outside where he was pushed to the ground and repeatedly hit and kicked by the males. After the attack, the victim ran away and flagged down an officer for help.

If your stoned ass is driving on I74 at night in a car that the cops are looking for and it just so happens to be loaded with drugs … don’t speed.

Police said they found about 63 grams of crack cocaine and 115 grams of marijuana in the car when they arrested Wesley E. Mooney, 34, and Tanara L. Chandler, 29. They also found an undetermined amount of currency.

The Peoria Multi-Drug Enforcement Group alerted area police that a car believed to be transporting drugs left Peoria and traveled west.

An Illinois state trooper stopped the car on Interstate 74 for traveling 75 mph in a 65 mph zone. The Peoria County K-9 unit was called, and the dog alerted officers to the presence of drugs.

Mooney and Chandler are charged in Knox County court with possession of a controlled substance, possession of a controlled substance with intent to deliver, possession of marijuana and possession of marijuana with intent to deliver.

And finally, if you are a certified crazy woman who likes to get into fist fights with Kindergarten teachers … don’t have 100 Ecstacy pills sitting around your house the night before you begin serving your 6 month sentence or you might just end up in Prison 30 for years.

Maisha Rickmon was to begin serving a six-month jail sentence tomorrow but she wound up behind bars a little sooner than she expected after being arrested at her house with more than 100 Ecstasy pills.

Rickmon, 26, of 1029 W. Johnson St. had just been sentenced Friday for attacking her son’s kindergarten teacher last year. Later that day, she was arrested by officers of Peoria’s Vice and Narcotics unit who had obtained a search warrant for her home.

Once inside, officers found more than 100 Ecstasy pills. Now, she faces a charge of possession of more than 15 but less than 100 grams of Ecstasy with intent to deliver, a felony that could send her to prison for at least six and possibly up to 30 years.

You can thank me later.

6 Responses to “Simple Lessons for Stupid People”

  1. mortonmalaise Says:

    As Boss in Cool Hand Luke said, “I don’t like it any more than you do. There’s some men you just can’t reach.” You can’t fix stupid.

  2. Blogs: Around the Peoria blogosphere » Peoria Pundit Says:

    [...] does the same thing, only to petty criminals. I know, I know … a difference that MAKES no difference [...]

  3. diane vespa Says:

    did you say we SHOULD or SHOULD NOT have the ecstacy pills laying around?

  4. PeoriaIllinoisan Says:

    Well, that’s up to you I guess, and I understand wanting to party before being thrown in jail, but I think 100 pills might be a bit excessive, don’t you? On second thought, maybe super mom might want to spend some time with her kindergarten age kid. Another shining example of what’s wrong with Peoria and D150, though it’s really not limited to Peoria.

  5. Cory Says:

    Maybe next time she should eat the X BEFORE she meets with the kindergarten teacher. Hugs are way better than punches.

    Oh, and 100 pills really isn’t that many.

  6. Michael Davis Says:

    Maybe she should share the pills with the teacher. Just as long as they don’t decide to road “trip” it down 74…

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